Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains, Expert Opinion, Week 8

Amber Dowling, TV Guide Canada
Did anyone else think the close-up of Rupert covered head-to-toe in mud was amazing? He looked like an Amazon warrior or something — way cooler than Coach and his spa mud, “coming into his own” and all. In all seriousness, I’ll miss the Dragon Slayer and his antics now that he’s gone. At least he’s on the jury — a fact that means there will be a Final 3, not 2 — and we’ll get to see him on the last episode.
 
Sandra’s brilliant move, planting a bug in Russell’s ear that Coach wanted him gone, is exactly why she will go far in this game. Every time there’s a move to be made, she is somehow always around. These players would do well to remember that she is the only Survivor contestant to have never had a vote cast against her.

But they won’t. This season is all about who has the stronger alliance, not which side can stay together the strongest and longest. The heroes learned that lesson the hard way — it wasn’t until they were forced to vote out James that they finally started winning. They’re still no match for the likes of Sandra, Parvati and Russell though.

Michael Bolen, National Post's theampersand.ca
As the commercial says: “Even kids know it’s wrong to hold out on somebody.” I love Survivor, but last night’s episode left me feeling like I missed the fine print. I respect that using editing to create tension is necessary, but by the time the episode ends the audience should still be able to figure out what actually happened. Russ’ vote for Courtney went completely unexplained and left me wondering if he’s as in control of the Villains as we are being led to believe.

It’s possible that Russ’ choice was meant to win Coach’s jury vote (he did sign his name), but maybe Parvati and Danielle went their own way. Who knows, perhaps Russ was even anticipating an idol play by Coach and decided that splitting the votes would be the best way the prevent a blindside? The trouble is none of these explanations fit particularly well with the narrative we were presented; something crucial must have been left out.

And is Boston Rob really such a fan favourite that the producers needed to devote the entire opening and a good chunk of the rest of the episode to lamenting his departure? We get it. Jeff loves Rob. But the constant harping about how dumb the Villains were to vote out their strongest players is getting old. As Amber pointed out last week, team unity is totally overrated. 

Kat Angus, Dose.ca
Hey, Coach, remind me: how many of the other Villains threw their vote away last week by voting for Courtney? Oh, was that just you? Then I’m pretty sure your anger at Boston Rob being voted out is entirely misplaced. I’d tell you to look in a mirror, but a) there are no mirrors on Survivor, b) if there were, you’d never do anything else, and c) that sounds like something Jeff Probst would say, and I’m a way better writer than whoever is scripting his lines.

(For reals, Jeff Probst desperately needs a copy editor. Sentences like “Russell acted in his own self-interest,” and “the Heroes win their third straight challenge in a row” make my inner grammar snob want to stab blunt pencils through my eyes.)

But I’m not being entirely fair, because all of the Villains apparently went batcrap crazy the second Boston Rob walked off the tribal council set. Bickering, flip flopping, refusing to commit to a plan – it’s all bad for team morale, but heck, it’s good TV. It’s a big relief to see that they’re just as petty as the Heroes, but unlike the Heroes, the Villains’ self-destruction is fun to watch because they dominated the game for so long.

Unfortunately, the Villains’ newfound inability to win a challenge meant that Coach and his wonderful, ridiculous lunacy are out of the game for good.

Bill Brioux, TV Feeds My Family
That dumbass Coach was eliminated on Survivor last night. With both Coach and Boston Rob gone, the Villains are so weak they’re about to be awarded a Toronto sports franchise.

Also eliminated this week, permanently, was an ex-Survivor producer’s wife; police got suspicious when they found a snuffed torch near the body. (Too soon? Hey, I stole this joke from FACEBOOK!) There was pizza and bowling on Survivor last night, plus the kids played a very muddy game of capture the flag.

Sandra went all Helena Guergis, whingeing about how she hates everybody. With all the interesting characters already gone, the producers resorted to many shots of crabs on the beach (insert Jerri joke here).

NEXT WEEK: The biggest, dumbest, most boneheaded move ever (besides me agreeing to write about this every week).